Underland: A Retelling of Alice in Wonderland
by No One's Fool
Summary: Alice Liddell is lost in Los Angeles. While trying to find her way home, she becomes embroiled in the Hearts' affairs and meets some very strange characters. This is a retelling; don't like, don't read! Based off of the classic book.


Alice Liddell sighed. Her taxi had driven off, although she'd asked for the driver to wait for her. He probably hadn't heard her. Perhaps it had been a mistake to pay him before she had gone into the store. Anyway, it didn't matter now. He was gone, and Alice was lost in Los Angeles. She sighed again, looking around and hoping to see someone she could ask for directions.

Alice was only visiting Los Angeles. She lived in small town Colorado, and was in L.A. for her friend's wedding. Lydia was married now, but Alice had decided to make a vacation of her visit. In hindsight, probably a bad idea. She knew no one in this city. "Well, maybe I can find a map, or a tourist booth, or something," she said to herself. She pulled her purse more tightly against her body and set off down the street, keeping a wary eye out. Alice was not a fool.

A young man wearing a grocery store uniform walked past hurriedly, muttering to himself and glancing at his watch. A rabbit tattoo just peeked out from under the watchband. Alice picked up her pace to chase after him, trying to catch up to ask for directions. His name badge had read "Romero," and he looked like a nice enough person. He was Latino, but his hair was bleached almost white. It was an odd look, but he fit in well enough in this rather seedy area of town. "Excuse me!" Alice called.

'Romero' either didn't hear her, or didn't listen. "Can't be late for Amora's party," he muttered. "Gotta get ready!" He quickened his pace again.

Alice tried to keep up, her legs burning from her attempt to catch Romero's attention. She wasn't really paying attention to where she was following him to, and all at once she realized that she had absolutely no clue where she was. She already didn't know Los Angeles, but this area looked particularly scary. Romero disappeared around a street corner, but by the time Alice got there he was out of sight.

She felt like crying. Great. Now she was lost in the Los Angeles underground, lost in unfamiliar territory. Lightning flashed high overhead, the crack of thunder following close behind. It began to rain in torrents. Alice darted for the nearest house, ducking under the porch. There was a dog-door in the front door, and she stared at it for a brief second. The house seemed deserted; surely the owners wouldn't mind if she went inside to escape the rain and dry off. Without looking around, Alice crouched down and tried to fit inside the dog-door. Of course, she was too large. She stood again. "Wonderful!" she said in exasperation. She couldn't even get into a deserted house.

Alice smacked the front door, frustrated, and to her surprise the door creaked inwards. It wasn't locked. Now Alice did glance around, but there was nobody on the street. With a deep breath, she opened the door the rest of the way and went inside.

The house was dark and musty, but it was warmer than outside. Alice shivered in her wet clothes, and went into the kitchen to try to find a dishtowel to dry her hair. She spied a set of drawers near the door and crouched down, opening the first one. As if by magic, the drawer was filled with neatly folded dishtowels. Alice took one with a sigh of relief, pulling her hair in front of her and wrapping the dishtowel around the soaking strands.

"You know, most people ask before nicking other people's dishtowels," an amused English accent drawled behind her.

Alice whirled to find a middle-aged man sitting at a table against the far wall of the kitchen. There was an odd contraption on the table, which seemed to be burning something. Tubes stuck out of it at odd angles. As she watched, the man clamped his lips around one tube and seemed to puff on it for a couple seconds. "I'm sorry," she managed after a second. "But I was soaking wet and cold, and I don't know where I am, and I figured if I could only get dry—"

"You don't have to explain yourself to me," the man chuckled. "I left the front door open for a reason. My name is Caden."

"Alice Liddell," Alice said immediately, having been raised to be polite. "Pleased to meet you."

"Likewise," Caden said drowsily. "So you don't know where you are?"

Alice shook her head. "No," she answered. He went back to smoking his hookah – she recognized the contraption on the table after staring at it for a few seconds – and Alice was left to examine him while she waited for him to answer. He didn't look any one age. His hair was black, with no gray, but little wrinkles around his eyes and mouth suggested that he wasn't as young as he looked. His eyes were very blue, and seemed to glow as he smiled at her.

"All you have to do is think," Caden said at last.

Alice snorted. "Oh, that's very helpful. This is my first time in Los Angeles!"

Caden sighed, sliding his chair back from the table and getting to his feet. He walked over to Alice and put his hand on the small of her back, guiding her to the door. "See that yellow house over there?" he pointed off into the distance, and Alice squinted. She was barely able to make out the house, so she nodded. "Someone lives there that can help you find your way out of this place." He stepped away.

Alice turned to thank him, but he was already gone. With a shrug, she stepped out onto the porch once more. Her hair and clothes were nearly dry, and the rain had stopped. Cheerfully, Alice set out in the direction of the yellow house.

Unfortunately, she lost sight of it almost immediately. From the street, it wasn't in immediate view. Alice stopped and looked around for another porch to stand on. She'd just ascended the stairs when she heard the tramping of running feet. She pressed herself against one porch rail and watched as a group of men ran past. There were ten of them, a mix of ages and ethnicities. But they all had one thing in common: their shirts were black, and they all wore a red cloth tied around their right biceps.

One spotted her and came over. Alice tried to act nonchalant. "Have you seen a young guy?" the man demanded.

"I've seen a lot of guys recently," Alice said, proud of herself when she sounded aloof. "Got a better description?"

"Latino, white hair," the man expounded. "Got a rabbit tattoo on his left wrist. Seen him?"

Alice nodded. "Yes, but I don't know where he went. Sorry."

The man waved his hand at her in disgust, rejoining the other nine who were waiting in the middle of the street. "She don't know anything," Alice barely heard him say to his compatriots. "We'll tell Amora we lost him. Maybe she'll be lenient."

There was that Amora person again! Alice had no idea who Amora was, but she didn't sound like a pleasant person. Once the ten men had run out of sight, Alice breathed a sigh of relief and stood on her tiptoes, searching for the elusive yellow house. At last she spotted it once more through the crack between two other houses, across the alley. Alice was not going to risk walking through a deserted alley alone in L.A., so she resolved to walk until she found the end of the street she was on and cross there.

She walked slowly, keeping an eye out for more of the black-shirted men. She didn't know much about big cities, but her gut told her that ten guys wearing some kind of uniform spelled bad news. She hoped that they wouldn't find Romero.

At last, Alice made it to the end of the street. After looking both ways – although she didn't know why, since the street was deserted – she crossed and walked hurriedly past the alley, not daring to look down it. At the next street, Alice turned. There was the yellow house, sitting brightly about halfway down the street. She squared her shoulders and began hurrying over. Her legs ached by this time, and all she wanted was something to eat and drink. All this exercise was exhausting.

When Alice reached the yellow house, she was suddenly overcome with shyness. She had no idea who lived there, and if she could even trust this Caden person. Could she rely on the advice of a man who smoked hookah? What was even in hookah? Did it alter his judgment? She frowned. Well, it wasn't as if she had much choice. She didn't know where she was, and she didn't know how to get back to her hotel. Apparently, the person in the yellow house was her best shot at getting home.

With that in mind, Alice marched straight up to the yellow house and rapped sharply on the door. "Ah, come on in!" another English accent told her. Alice blinked. What were the odds of meeting two English men in under an hour, especially in Los Angeles? Without thinking, she raised her hand to twist the doorknob. Her brain objected almost immediately. She didn't know who was inside. He could be a serial killer!

_Nonsense_, she thought to herself. "And if he is," she said to herself, "I've got pepper spray." She lifted her chin and went inside. For a moment, she stood in the entryway to let her eyes adjust to the dim interior of the house. When she could see properly, she looked around skeptically. The place was decorated haphazardly, with a couple hats hanging on a coat rack on one wall. A bolt of sturdy cloth sat on the staircase. "Hello?" she asked tentatively.

A youngish man appeared in a doorway, smiling at her. "You're just in time!"

Alice stared at him in apprehension, looking him over. He didn't appear to be a serial killer. His hair was slightly on the long side, falling in his friendly brown eyes. A rather steampunk top hat sat on his head, tilted jauntily to one side. "Just in time for what?" she managed after a second.

"For the tea party, of course!" he said brightly.

_What is it with the English and tea?_ Alice wondered. "Okay," she said out loud. She sounded unsure, even to herself.

The man came over and grabbed her elbow, pulling her into the kitchen. Alice was busily rooting through her purse, palming the little can of pepper spray, as he did so. When she looked up, she was astonished to see another man and a little girl sitting around a table. The table was set for a tea party. "Take a seat," the man invited.

Alice sat in the seat closest to her, staring around with amusement that she desperately tried to hide. The man was nearly asleep. He was African-American, with close-cropped black hair. Alice couldn't see his eyes, but she guessed they were brown. The little girl was maybe eight, her blonde hair pulled into curly pigtails on either side of her head. She had the same brown eyes as Top Hat Man, so Alice assumed that they were either siblings or father and daughter. "Hi," she said when the little girl looked at her.

The girl beamed widely. "Mads, she came!" She, too, had an English accent. Alice found she wasn't even surprised.

The man looked embarrassed, shushing the girl quickly. "Yes, March, she came. Caden doesn't lie."

March smiled at Alice again. "I'm March. I'm glad you're here! It was terrible with just Mad's friend." She couldn't say her 'R's. It was rather adorable.

"I'm Alice," she introduced herself to March.

March nodded. "I know. Mads told me."

Top Hat Man sighed. "My nickname is _Max_," he corrected her. March stuck her tongue out at him. He ignored her, turning to Alice and holding out his hand. "Maddox," he said. "This is Dorian."

Alice shook his hand, and nodded to the sleeping man. "Pleased to meet you," she said.

"Pleased to treacle," he muttered back. Alice shrugged.

March stood and poured Alice some tea. "Would you like a biscuit?"

"Yes, please," Alice accepted graciously, deciding to humor the young girl. She was surprised when March set a cookie on her plate, but she didn't say anything. She set her pepper spray on the table, cautiously sipped at her tea, and relaxed at the familiar flavor of chamomile. "This is very good," she complimented March.

March grinned. "Mads made it." Alice looked at Maddox, who nodded. "I'm not s'posed to work the teapot. Mads said I could get burned."

"He's right," Alice backed Maddox up. She glanced at him again. He leaned back in his chair, sipping his tea, but he winked at her. She scowled at him.

March turned to Dorian. "Dorian, would you like some tea?"

The sleeping man didn't stir. "He still has some," Alice said for him, after peeking into his cup.

"So, Alice," Maddox said, addressing her. "Why are you here? Caden said you'd be coming; he didn't say why."

"I'm lost," Alice confessed, putting her teacup back onto her saucer and breaking off a corner of her cookie-biscuit. "I'm not from around here, you see, and my taxi driver drove off and left me here. Caden said you could help me find my way back to the hotel."

"All right, I'll help," Maddox folded his hands across his chest.

Alice brightened. "Oh, thank you!"

"If you can answer my riddle," he went on, as if she hadn't spoken.

She frowned. Odd that he would require an answer to a riddle before helping her, but she was game. "Okay, what's the riddle?" she asked.

He smirked. "Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Alice's mouth dropped open. "That's not a riddle!" she spluttered.

"Sure it is," he insisted. "What's the answer?"

"Well, how should I know?" Alice demanded. "I've never heard of that riddle before!"

Maddox leaned back in his seat. "I'm not helping you until you answer," he informed her.

Alice thought for a few minutes, finishing her cookie-biscuit. "Both have only a single 'E," she announced at last, pleased with her answer.

Maddox opened his mouth, but March beat him to it. "No, silly!" she chortled. "That's not the answer!"

Alice stood abruptly, putting her teacup down with a 'clink!' of finality. "This is ridiculous. If you won't help, I'm leaving." She slipped her purse strap over her shoulder and left the kitchen in a huff, leaving the three strangers to their tea party. "Of all the stupid things," she muttered to herself as she opened the door and stepped outside.

"Hey, you!" a voice barked at her. Alice found herself holding a hand to her chest, as if asking 'me?' One of the black-shirted men was standing across the street. "I remember you. Are you quite sure you don't remember where Romero is?"

"Quite," Alice said. She noticed that he was holding a dozen white roses, but he didn't seem to like it. "What are the roses for?" she asked before she could stop herself.

"Amora," the man said. "But she doesn't like white roses, so I'm getting red ones."

Alice wasn't quite sure what to make of that. "Oh," she replied. The man sighed and continued on his way. Alice watched him go until he was out of sight before realizing that he could have led her back to her hotel. "Drat!" she said, frustrated. With a dejected huff, she set off down the street once more, intent on wandering around until she found someone who _would_ help. And who didn't insist on her answering a riddle with no solution. "A raven like a writing desk," she muttered derisively. "Come on, really?"

She'd walked a good six streets over when another black-shirted man called out, "Hold it right there!" Alice froze. He came over, folding his arms across his chest. The red cloth on his bicep strained under his muscles. He looked her over for a moment. "You'll do," he said at last.

"Do for what?" she inquired tentatively as he grabbed her arm and hauled her along with him.

"Amora's croquet game," he grunted. "She needs one more, and she wants a girl."

Amora again! Who was this mystery woman? "All right," Alice agreed. Not that she had much choice; it wasn't as if she could beat the black-shirted, muscle-bound man who was currently dragging her behind him. After that, she couldn't work up the courage to talk to the man, so she let herself be pulled along meekly. After twenty minutes or so of walking, they arrived at a pretty little park. There were quite a lot of people milling around, and Alice found it hard to believe that this Amora person couldn't find enough people for her croquet game.

Almost everyone in the park wore a black shirt and a red armband. And in the middle of everyone, a small woman with copper hair stood, tapping her foot impatiently. "I found you another player, Amora," the man said, inclining his head politely.

"Good," the woman said shortly. "Go find yourself a mallet," she instructed Alice. Alice instantly obeyed. The only one left was orange, so she took it and the orange ball and went to join the other players. They were waiting a little away from all the other people. All five seemed terrified. "Begin!" Amora shouted. All the players began at the same time.

"Hey!" Alice said, as one man jostled her out of the way. "This is _not_ how you play croquet! Everyone goes one at a time!" She ducked as someone swung their mallet over her head. "Watch it!" she snapped at him.

No one listened. After another five minutes, the croquet game hadn't gone anywhere. Everyone was still at the first stake, being unable to get their ball through the first wicket. "Excuse me!" Alice bellowed. The other five players stopped, staring at her with shock. "Like this," she said more quietly. She stepped up to the stake and gently batted her ball through the first two wickets.

"Stop!" Amora, with authority. She stepped up to the players. "What are you doing?" she asked one woman.

The woman seemed to be trembling. "She made us stop," she pointed to Alice.

Amora turned to Alice. "And who are you, to be dictating how to play croquet?" she demanded frostily.

"Alice," Alice said. "And I was showing them how because I know how," she explained. She found she had the urge to call Amora 'Your Majesty,' but thought that the name probably wouldn't go over well. "Ma'am," she added.

Amora glared. "They are playing the game the way I want them to play it. Ed! Ted!" Two beefy, bodyguard sorts stepped up behind her. They appeared to be twins. Alice gulped nervously. "Off with her," Amora smirked.

Before either man could move, a commotion rang out somewhere in the corner of the park. Amora sighed and moved off, forgetting all about punishing Alice. Ed and Ted walked after the redhead.

Alice stood motionless for a few heartbeats. Then someone grabbed her arm and put their hand over her mouth at the same time. Alice tried to shriek, but couldn't. "Don't scream," the person muttered in her ear. "I'm getting you out of here." She relaxed and let the man pull her away from the rest of the party. After they were on the other side of the trees, the man took his hand away from her mouth and moved back. Alice turned to find Maddox looking her over. "You all right?" he asked. She nodded. "How did you get to her party?"

"I was abducted," Alice clarified. "After you wouldn't help," she said accusingly, "I went off to find my own way. And then this big guy grabbed me and hauled me off here. How did you find me?"

"That'd be me," a new voice volunteered.

Alice turned to see a teenage boy with piercing hazel eyes smiling at her. "Oh," she said.

"M'name's Griffin," he introduced himself with a little half-bow. "After I see that big guy takin' you, I thinks to meself, _Griffin,_ thinks I, _She looks afraid, she does. Better get Maddox._ So I gets him and tells him where you gone to. Then I made a distraction so he could get you outta there."

"Thank you," Alice breathed. "I think you saved my life."

An angry screech rose above the trees. "Uh-oh," Maddox said. "She figured it out. Better get out of here!" The three of them ran for it.

"So who's taking care of March?" Alice found herself asking.

"Dorian," Maddox gasped out. He slowed to a stop about eight streets from the park.

Alice frowned. "But he just sleeps all the time! You trust him to take care of your—" she broke off, unsure of whether to say 'sister' or 'daughter,' and not wanting to offend her savior.

"Sister," he provided. "And I do. He's my best mate. They'll probably just watch the telly until I get back, yeah?"

She shrugged. Griffin nodded to them both and slipped off between two houses. "Thanks again," she said to Maddox. "I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't rescued me." He just smiled, and they set off at a leisurely pace. "Nice hat," she added. Somehow, he had managed to keep the top hat on his head during the entire escape.

"Thanks," he touched the hat. "I made it myself."

Alice stopped, turning to inspect the hat more carefully. "Really?"

"Mmhmm. My father and my grandfather and my great-grandfather were all hatters. It's more of a hobby for me than a profession, but I still enjoy it, yeah?" Maddox adjusted the top hat to its previous angle.

"So," she said as they began walking again. "You're going to help me?"

"Nah," he grinned. "You still haven't answered my riddle."

Alice threw up her hands. "Then why did you rescue me?"

"So you could answer it, of course," he said, as if she were stupid. Alice just shook her head. "Any guesses?"

She sighed. "None," she admitted. "I give up. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

"I haven't the foggiest," Maddox told her cheerfully. "I was hoping you'd know!"

Alice groaned and slugged his shoulder. "Now will you help me?"

He rubbed at his shoulder. "You didn't have to hit me," he complained. "And yeah, I'll help you." Something rang in his pocket, and he frowned. He dug out a cell phone and peered at the name. "It's March," he said, as if that were surprising. "Hello?" He listened for a couple seconds. "All right. Thanks, March. Stay hidden, yeah?" Another pause. "Love you, too. Bye." He hung up and slid the phone back into his pocket. "The Hearts just stopped by my house. March and Dorian didn't answer the door, but that means Amora knows that I took you away."

"The Hearts?" Alice asked.

Maddox looked at her, surprised. "Amora's gang. They're the Hearts." Alice had never heard of the Hearts before, but that didn't really surprise her since she wasn't from the area. "If they're looking for me, then they really want you back. We'll have to stay out of sight on the way back to wherever it is you're going."

"My hotel," Alice told him.

"Where is it?" Alice gave him the address of the hotel, and he sighed. "Great. That's a long way from here. We'll have to take the back route. Hopefully they don't know where you're staying."

She frowned. "Why would they? I only told them my first name."

"How many Alices could there be staying in hotels around here?" Maddox raised one eyebrow.

"They wouldn't know I'm staying in a hotel," she insisted.

Maddox stopped, turning to face her. "Look, Alice, I know that you don't know this, but you practically scream 'out of towner.' It's not hard to guess that you're not from L.A."

Alice sighed, shivering and hugging herself. "Great," she muttered.

He shrugged out of his greatcoat, setting it on her shoulders. "Here," he said gruffly.

Alice pulled the coat closer, slightly comforted by the warmth it retained from his body. "Thanks," she smiled. "So what do we do? If the Hearts know all this stuff, then I'm not safe anywhere."

"The Hearts?" a new, feminine voice said. A woman melted out of the shadows caused by the setting sun. Her hair was white blonde, and she wore a black jacket zipped up halfway. "What do you know about the Hearts?"

"I'm running from them," Alice said immediately. Maddox subtly elbowed her in the side, shooting her a glance to tell her not to say anything else.

The woman looked elated. "Then you've had contact with them?" She whipped out a black wallet, flipping it open and holding it up to reveal a police badge. "Blanche Chevalier, LAPD," she said. "I'm trying to bust the leader of the Hearts."

"Amora?" Alice asked.

Blanche nodded. "She's guilty of at least three murders, and that's only the ones we can tie her to for sure. Her seconds in command, Ed "Tweed" Lee and Ted "Dwum" Lee, are guilty of more than that."

"They were at a park," Alice helpfully informed the detective. "About half a mile from here, I think."

Blanche nodded. "Thank you for your help," she said, stepping away and disappearing into the growing darkness.

Maddox gave Alice a reproachful glance. "She could be working for them," he pointed out.

"She had a badge," Alice pointed out in return.

"Badges can be faked," Maddox countered.

Alice gave up, rolling her eyes. "Why did the twins have such strange nicknames?" she asked.

"Ed made the unfortunate mistake of wearing a tweed coat to a meeting once," Maddox explained. "He's been teased about it ever since. I don't know about Ted, but he does have a slight speech impediment. Maybe he's being teased for that."

Alice stared at him. "How did you know that?"

He snorted. "Anybody who lived in that neighborhood knows what goes on," he said. "Plus, Dorian's brother was in the Hearts."

"Oh," she answered. She didn't miss the 'was.' Hopefully Dorian's brother hadn't left the Hearts on a gurney. "Are the Hearts responsible for a lot of deaths?"

Maddox thought for a few minutes. "Not as many as some other gangs," he said at last. "But quite a few, nonetheless." He shook his head. "I wouldn't want you anywhere near them."

Alice smiled up at him. "That's very sweet of you."

He shifted uncomfortable. "'Sweet' has nothing to do with it," he muttered. "I wouldn't wish them on anybody." They were standing near an alley now, just outside the circle of light a nearby street lamp provided. Suddenly, he looked over her head and his eyes widened. "Great," he muttered.

"What?" she asked, starting to twist to see what he was looking at.

"Don't move!" he said quickly, grabbing her shoulders to keep her still. "It's the Hearts. If they see you, we're both dead." Then he frowned. "Actually, if they see _me,_ we're both dead as well." He looked around, probably searching for an escape. His eyes landed on the alley, and without a word he pulled her into it, pinned her to a nearby fence, and kissed her soundly.

Alice squeaked indignantly, but his hands tightened on her shoulders to keep her still. She barely heard the sound of running feet passing by over the thundering of her heartbeat, but most of her attention was focused on trying to push Maddox back.

After the sound of the Hearts running past had faded totally, Maddox moved away. Alice gawked up at him. "What was that for?" she gasped out.

"Couldn't let them see our faces," he mumbled. "Look, it was all I could think of doing, yeah? It was either that or an attempt to be inconspicuous. I took the chance that they wouldn't pay a couple any mind."

Alice's indignation faded. He had only been trying to protect her. "Fine, but next time a little warning would be nice," she grumbled.

"All right, next time I save your life, I'll outline exactly what I plan to do before I do it!" Maddox snapped. Alice couldn't tell if he was hurt, embarrassed, or angry, so she just let him vent.

"It was a good plan," a black-haired man said from beside them. Apparently without thinking, Maddox put out his arm to keep himself between the stranger and Alice. She was rather touched. The newcomer had green eyes so vivid that they seemed to be glowing, and he was grinning widely at the two of them, revealing sparkling white teeth.

"Who are you?" Maddox demanded.

Alice peeped over his shoulder in time to see the stranger give a little bow. "Chester Silvestris," he introduced himself.

"What do you want?" she asked, more curious than suspicious. Maddox shot her another warning glance.

"Nothing," Chester said with another wide grin. "I merely observe. Being on the run isn't easy, you two. You may want to come up with a different plan. The Hearts are already at Alice's hotel."

Maddox squinted at Chester. "How do you know all that?"

Chester merely laughed. "I know everything," he said. "You may find that helping the police could help you," he said, backing into the darkness. "Good luck!" The last thing to disappear was his white smile.

Alice couldn't help but feel slightly creeped out. "Do you know who he was?" she asked.

Maddox shrugged. "I've heard of him. He's a kook, but he's harmless."

Alice hugged his greatcoat closer to her body. "How do we help the police?"

He shrugged. "I suppose we could carry wires and let ourselves be caught. I've heard that Amora tries all her prisoners. That could give the police enough time to get in."

This plan didn't thrill Alice, but it was a decent enough one. "All right," she agreed. "Let's do that. Hopefully we won't die before she can be taken into custody."

They walked in silence to the police station. There, after explaining that Alice was wanted by Amora and that Maddox was wanted for helping Alice escape, they were outfitted with wires and set loose on the streets of the L.A. underground.

"I hope this is a good idea," Maddox whispered.

"Me, too," Alice nodded.

Someone shouted behind them, and both turned to look. It was the same muscle-bound Heart that had taken Alice in the first place. "Run!" Maddox told her, and they both took off. When she started to fall behind, he grabbed her hand to pull her along with him. It made little difference, though. The Hearts soon caught up, and Alice and Maddox were quickly taken into their custody. Alice cried out when one of the Hearts twisted her arms painfully behind her back, and Maddox bristled. "Hey, be gentle with her, yeah?"

Alice quickly asked a question to prevent the Heart from taking offense. "Where are we going?"

"To Amora's hideout," the Heart growled. He bundled her into a waiting car, and the trip passed in silence. Alice tried to meet Maddox's eyes once, but the Heart cuffed her ear when she looked up. She winced and kept her head down. At the hideout, Alice chanced a glance up and quickly found the address of the building, as she'd been instructed, and read it out loud so that the police would know where they were.

Inside, Amora had all but set up a court. There was another "trial" already going on, so Alice and Maddox were ushered into the corner to wait.

Amora was glaring at a hapless Heart, who stood uncomfortably in the middle of the room. "Where are my tarts?" she demanded.

"I don't know!" The Heart almost wailed. She looked about nineteen.

Amora got to her feet. "Those tarts had nearly a million dollars worth of crack hidden inside," she hissed. "And you lost them! Now where are they?" The girl looked petrified. "Who. Stole. My. Tarts?" Amora enunciated in a dangerous voice. The girl shook her head, crying. Amora sighed. "Take her out back and take care of her," she said in a tired voice. The girl shrieked and tried to run, but was quickly grabbed by two other Hearts. "And what have we here?" Amora asked, regaining her commanding air and turning to where Alice and Maddox were being ushered into the middle of the room.

"Alice and Maddox," the muscle-bound Heart said smugly. "We found them, Ma'am."

"Excellent job, number three," Amora congratulated the man who must be her third-in-command. "So, Alice, why did you run?" she asked softly.

Alice swallowed hard. "You wanted your guards to take care of me!" she squeaked out, trying to speak clearly. "What would you have done?"

Amora paused. "Fair enough," she conceded. "But you can't ruin my party and get away with it, Alice. And Maddox," she went on, turning to the man standing calmly next to Alice. "Why did you help her, Maddox?"

Maddox lifted his chin. "She had asked me for help earlier. I felt guilty for turning her down. I didn't know that she was wanted."

Alice was amazed at how calm he sounded, since he was lying between his teeth. Amora seemed equally astonished. "Very well," she said. She returned to her chair at the front of the room. "Take them—"

"LAPD!" someone shouted, and police poured in from all entrances. One pushed the rather relieved nineteen-year-old Heart in front of him, and a second had the one who had been instructed to kill her. "Nobody move!" Blanche moved into sight, her gun trained on Amora. "You're under arrest, Amora," she said, bringing out a pair of handcuffs. "Down on the floor, hands behind your back." Amora sank to the floor, seething, and Blanche knelt to cuff her.

Another police officer came over. "Nice job, you two," he said. "We got the three Hearts waiting at the hotel, so it should be safe for you to return now."

"Thank you," Alice said gratefully. "I can't wait to go to sleep."

Maddox took his wire off and handed it to the police officer. "I'll take you back to the hotel now," he told her. Alice nodded and handed her own wire to the officer. Together they left the hideout and walked toward the hotel. Alice wasn't quite sure what to say. Maddox had risked his life for her – twice. How was she supposed to thank him for that? As soon as they hit the main street, Maddox hailed her a cab. "I hope the rest of your vacation is safe," he told her as he helped her into the cab. "Good bye, Alice."

"Thank you, Maddox," she said. He tipped his hat slightly after shutting the door, and the cabbie drove off in the direction of Alice's hotel. "Thank you so much," she whispered to his rapidly disappearing form.

The rest of her vacation passed uneventfully. In fact, Alice was downright bored. She was absurdly relieved when she boarded her plane to return to Colorado. Her parents met her at the airport, demanding details during the drive back to her apartment. She acquiesced, relating Lydia's wedding minute by minute and showing them the purchases she'd made at the high-end shops in Los Angeles. She left out the incident with the Hearts, not wanting to make them anxious and prone to worrying about her safety in the future.

Daily life in Colorado seemed dull and repetitive after her adventure in the L.A. underground. She went to work every day and read articles on what was happening with Amora and the rest of the hearts each night. The official report said that the police had been helped by two civilians, but their names had not been revealed. Alice smiled at that; the police were probably trying to protect their identities so that when, or if, the Hearts got out of prison, they would be safe.

After two weeks, Alice was thoroughly miserable. She hadn't liked Los Angeles, but she missed it with a passion that surprised her. The fourteenth night after her return, she sat down on her couch with a root-beer float and sighed, picking up a book she'd been reading. She found that she'd developed a taste for action adventure stories.

The doorbell rang, making her look up. "Who could that be?" she asked her goldfish, which she'd bought six days after returning from L.A. and had named Hatter for reasons she couldn't explain. Hatter didn't answer, so she went to the door. She peeked out the peephole, but couldn't see anyone. Swallowing hard, fervently hoping that it wasn't a Heart standing outside, she opened the door.

She was astonished to see Maddox standing on her doorstep, arms folded tightly across his chest. The expression on his face told her that he couldn't believe he was there. "Hi," she said, and hoped that he couldn't hear the slight dazed quality in her voice.

"You forgot your pepper spray at my house," he said hastily, holding out the little spray canister. Alice smiled as she took it. "I brought it back," he added awkwardly.

"You could have mailed it," Alice told him gently.

He shuffled his feet a little, looking at the ground. This gave Alice a good view of the hat he wore, which was not the steampunk top hat that she was ridiculously fond of but instead a rather edgy fedora. "I could have," he granted, almost incoherently. "But then I wouldn't have been able to see you, yeah?"

"Yeah," Alice agreed. "Won't you come in? I just made myself a root-beer float; I can make you one, too." Maddox tentatively stepped into her apartment, and Alice disappeared into her kitchen. "Excuse the mess," she called over her shoulder. "I wasn't expecting company. How did you find me?"

"Don't worry about it, and I asked Chester," he said absently, looking around her living room while she quickly made up another float. When she left the kitchen and handed him the float, he thanked her. "Nice goldfish," he told her.

"Thanks." She stopped herself just before blurting out his name. Why she'd thought Hatter was a good name she'd never know. Actually, it was a good name. It would just be awkward to tell Maddox that she'd named a fish after him.

Maddox went over to look at the goldfish. Hatter stared back, as if trying to impart some knowledge to his namesake. "What's his name?" Maddox asked at last.

Alice cringed at the feared question. "Hatter," she mumbled into her root-beer float, hoping he would hear something different. Like Harold, perhaps. Or Hammer, although he'd probably wonder why she'd named a goldfish Hammer.

Maddox set his float down on a coaster on the coffee table. "Hatter," he repeated, sounding surprised. Alice lifted her chin and turned her back to him resolutely, somehow succeeding in her endeavor not to blush. "Why would you name your goldfish Hatter?"

She shrugged. "It seemed like a good name."

"Alice," he said reprovingly, in a voice that said he didn't believe her.

"Fine, I wanted something to remember you by," she blurted out, and then put both hands over her mouth in abject horror.

"Yeah?" Maddox asked, coming over to stand in front of her. He lifted his hands to hers, his fingers curling around them to pry them away from her mouth. "Odd coincidence, that." He bent close. "I wanted something to remember you by, too." And with that, he kissed her. It was much different than the kiss he'd used to hide them from the Hearts in the alley. That kiss hadn't had any real emotion to it. This one certainly did.

When he lifted his head, Alice stared up at him and felt slightly stunned. "Oh," she breathed.

"'Oh'?" he teased. "That's the only thing you can think of?"

Alice smiled at him. "Yes," she confirmed. "But I'm sure if you kiss me again, I'll think of something else."

Maddox was all too happy to oblige.

* * *

><p><em>AN: Okay! Just wanted to clarify some things. I know that probably most of these characters are pretty obvious, but I just wanted to make sure I listed who everyone is supposed to be. Just on the off chance that someone who's not so familiar with _Alice in Wonderland_ or _Through the Looking Glass_ reads this._

_Romero is obviously the White Rabbit. His name was taken from the rabbit genus Romerolagus._

_Caden is the Caterpillar. I know nothing of hookah, and I don't approve, but it's canon so it's in there._

_Maddox is the Mad Hatter. I made him less mad and more quirky to fit in with the real world._

_March is the March Hare. I made her female and the Maddox's little sister so that he would have a reason to be having a tea party._

_Dorian is the Dormouse. Treacle should have been the indicator here._

_Griffin is the Gryphon. He had bad grammar in the novel, too._

_Chester Silvestris is the Cheshire Cat. Silvestris is part of the Latin name for a cat._

_Blanche Chevalier is the White Knight. Blanche Chevalier literally translates into "White Knight" in French._

_Amora is the Queen of Hearts. That's why her gang is called the Hearts. (Obviously.) Her name is also a variation of 'Amour,' the French word for love._

_Ed "Tweed" Lee and Ted "Dwum" Lee (stupid names, I know) are Tweedledee and Tweedledum. Their names are anagrams._


End file.
